Who are your friends?

1 If I wanted to know which friend you trust the most what would your answer be?
2 If I would ask you, “Who is your best friend?” what would you say?
3 If I tell you that you have won a two-weeks trip to a lonely island for two people. Which one of your friends would you take with you?

Depending on our relationship with the LORD Jesus we probably mention Him in our answers of questions one and two. Or else, if we are married, we might say that it is our husband. I wonder, though, how many of us would take our husbands on a two weeks trip to the isle?

For now, I would like for you to put aside options Jesus and husband, and think of your girlfriends. Who would you be most comfortable with spending a whole two weeks together?

Once you arrived at the destination, how would you spend your time together? What would you expect to find out about your friend? Would there be something you are afraid of that might annoy you while being so close to her for two weeks?

True, most of us don't spend that amount of time with our girlfriends. Even if we do go on vacation together we enjoy a good deal of hours on our own. Nevertheless, throughout the years we meet a lot with our friends, and so they have a more or less bigger influence on our lives.

What does God's Word say about friendships? Find out in one of my future posts. So please stay tuned.  

But how, by whose standard, does he decide which laws he has to keep and which ones he can ignore?
 
One of the best books I read about healthy eating is called What the Bible Says About Healthy Living by Rex Russell, M.D. Most of my friends and family act surprised whenever I mention the title of this book. I emphasize that Rex Russell explains what food we should and shouldn't eat. They usually want to know if he refers to dietary laws found in the Old Testament. As soon as I tell them that he does they are no longer with me. Do we still have to follow Old Testament laws about what to eat or not to eat?

In his book Rex Russell does not only argue from the laws found in the book of Leviticus, but he uses the whole Bible as his book of reference. First, he tells us what went wrong after Adam and Eve ate the forbidden fruit. Then, he gives us reasons for a Health with Obedience (chapter 2). Next, he explains The Three Principles:

• I Eat the Foods God Created for You
• II Don't Alter God's Design
• III Don't Let Any Food or Drink Become Your God

​In the last part he lists foods and drinks that should be on our menu. Reading the book from beginning to end the careful reader will notice that Russell uses the whole counsel of God and not only the book of Leviticus as a foundation for his arguments. He reminds his readers:

Go ahead and give it a try. Read it. You will be amazed about the common sense and the medical advice found in there. Yours and your family's health will greatly benefit from it. 

We have to watch our words. Unkind words can tear people apart, and they can break a marriage. As Christian women we should practice using words that are constructive rather than destructive. We need to focus on building up instead of tearing down.

It's so easy to give out, but it's hard to accept censure, isn't it? At times, we can really dish it out, can't we? But if we are attacked by harsh words we are deeply offended. Both times the problem lies in the way we handle the situation. 

We often go wrong by targeting the person and not the problem. We will say something like, "You never..." or "You always..." do this or that. Think of it from the other's point of view, if someone tells you that you never or you always do this or that, aren't you offended? 

A well-meaning friend threw me out of balance a while ago. She criticized one of my habits. First I was offended and went into defence mode. Then I decided to tackle the problem. I made some progress but only with baby steps. No, I'm far from avoiding this particular habit. Honestly? Each time I sense that someone shows the slightest attempt to mention it I'm thrown back to the beginning again. Did I need to hear the criticism? Perhaps. Was it okay for her to attack me and not my problem? No. Did she intentionally use hurtful words? I don't think so. 

Unkind and destructive words can come out in a flash. In some cases the offended person will eventually get over it. In other cases unfit words leave deep cuts behind. By all means we need to target the problem itself and not the person. Sometimes that isn't quite as easy to do, I know. Here are just two ideas how to attack the problem and not the person:

The toothpaste problem: Are you annoyed because the tube of toothpaste in your bathroom looks the way it does - all but nice and neatly squeezed? >> Don't get annoyed at the people using it. Get a toothpast roller (also called squeezer) to tackle the problem.

The laundry problem: Tired of having to collect all the socks and shirts off the floors and out of each room? Buy a few extra popup or foldable laundry hampers. They are available in many nice colors. Put one in each bedroom. Tell each family member that only the clothes that are in the hampers will be taken to the laundry room to be washed, dried, folded, and brought back to the rooms. 

A full-time homemaker doesn't leave her home to make money, but she is out to save the family some money each month. The family's finances will not increase, but they will decrease slower than usual. In other words, less money spend will make the regular income last longer.

Following are few ideas on how to stretch your monthly resources:

• Buy generic. Many times a product of a generic brand will be just as good as its branded opponent. It will cost less and will save you money in the long run.
• Create a menu. Yes, this will help you to spend less. Buy only the groceries to make the meals (plus additional items that are needed like cosmetic, hygiene, and paper articles, of course).
• Set a limit on spending. a) Bring cash only with you to the supermarket. Leave your credit card at home. This way you are not tempted to spend more than your set limit. b) Don't buy more clothes than you need. Narrow your selection of colors and styles of clothes, shoes and accessories to a minimum. c) Save up your money to pay cash for a car or a computer, and don't go on vacation if you have to take out a loan to do so.  

What does God's Word tell us about our finances? If we would do a topic search about money we would bump into keywords and phrases like: 
Don't love money. Love God instead.

• You cannot serve two masters. You cannot serve God and money. (Matthew 6:24)
• The cares of this world, the deceitfulness of riches, and the desires for other things choke the Word. Then the Word becomes unfruitful. (Mark 4:19)
  
• Riches that are here today might be gone tomorrow. (Proverbs 23:4-5)
• The one who loves wealth will never have enough. (Ecclesiastes 5:10) 

God asks you to be content with what you have. (1 Timothy 6:6) Don't worry about things like clothing, drink, and food. Seek first the Kingdom of God. Your heavenly Father does provide for you. (Matthew 6:25-34)

God owns everything. It's all His. In 1 Chronicles we read:

See, we don't own our money. We are stewards of it. God gives us the resources freely, but He also asks us to be wise in the way we handle them. As full-time Christian homemakers we are given the opportunity to praise and honor Him in the way we are handling "our" monthly income.  

I was looking for a good recipe for making strawberry jam today. The recipes I found online were not good enough. They asked for too much sugar, water, and gelling agents. An old recipe book came into my mind. So I knelt in front of the kitchen cupboard and, after taking out most of the things, I found the old Weck® book all the way in the back. I scanned through it and found some recipes I liked. I noticed that many of these 1950s recipes were quite different than the ones we find in today's cookbooks.

The jam recipes in my old book called for less sugar, no water, and no gelling agents. I tried one of them today. As hubby walked into the kitchen he said: "It sure smells good in here." He got to taste fresh, homemade strawberry jam. He didn't miss any sugar in it. In fact, he mentioned that the jam was quite sweet. This means that next time I could use even less sugar. I'm delighted about that. There will be homemade jam on our breakfast table from now on. 

Processed food contains a lot more than the original ingredient/s. It will have additives and preservatives inside. Many of these add on products are more or less unhealthy for us. If you look at the product packaging label you will discover ingredients you probably never heard of before. The question is: Are they necessary, healthy, filling?

I give you three reasons why you should consider to make food from scratch: 

1. It's healthier. It often contains less sugar, less salt, no additives and no preservatives. 
2. It tastes better. You are in control of the taste. You can pack the food with the flavors you and your family prefer. 
3. It's a way to show love. You surely heard the proverb: The way to a man's heart is through his stomach. It is true. Give it a try. 

Now, I have to admit that baking and cooking does take time. Sometimes we will have to invest a lot of time to get the right results. Today's jam recipes will take only 3-5 minutes to complete. Making jam according to a recipe of the good ol' fashion days requires 20-25 minutes. The tasty outcome proves, though, that the right ingredients and the extra time spent are well worth it.  

In Exodus 18 we find a story about Moses judging the people. Some of the issues brought before him were minor while others were major problems that needed to be solved. From morning until evening the people came to Moses asking him to settle their issues. At some point the workload became too heavy for Moses. He was not able to carry it out on his own. Jethro, his father-in-law, said to him:
​

In my last post, Tough Decisions, I shared with you a story about one of my saddest times in my life. After reading a tract about marriage, divorce, and remarriage my husband and I had to face the question of whether we could stay married or if we would have to get a divorce. This is a follow up to Friday's post.

We prayed. We asked, no, we begged, we pleaded with the LORD for our marriage.

What are you supposed to do in a situation like that? Search for articles, read books, go online for help? How about asking your pastor, friend, or members of your family what they would do? For us the dilemma started after reading what a particular denomination says about remarriage.

I will not mention the tract in details nor tell you more about that denomination. This post is not intended to refute their arguments nor to belittle their denomination.

The whole point I want you to get out of this post is: Search the Scriptures for answers. I don't mean for you to pick and choose as you please (oh, I'm very much guilty of having done that before) but to diligently search for answers in the Bible.  

Searching for answers in God's Word means to be ready:

• to clear yourself of your own opinion and thinking,
  
• accept His will (as revealed in His Word),
  
• do what He tells you to do.  

Our marriage could have ended right there. To move forward we had to accept to do whatever He would require us to do. We had to lay our marriage on the Altar of God. All glory to Him, He had plans for us to remain married.

No matter what you are facing, in all you do, seek God's will first. 

This had been one of the saddest times of my life. I had read a tract about marriage, divorce, and remarriage, handed it over to my husband, and eagerly waited for him to share his thoughts about it with me.

“Let's pray. Let's ask God to reveal to us, through His Word, what He wants us to do.”

We prayed. We asked, we begged, we pleaded with the LORD for our marriage.

This particular tract argued that a person who remarried, after having been married and divorced before, must get a divorce and go back to the first spouse and marry that spouse again. The second marriage, or any that follows after the first one, except after the death of the first spouse, is sinful in God's eyes.

In a situation like this one we tend to find out all we can by...
reading articles and books about it
searching the internet for answers
asking our pastor, friends, or members of our close family what they suggest we should do

However, this kind of situation calls for a serious digging into the Bible!
    Pray for wisdom and understanding from God.
    Read your Bible. Trust in God's Word.
    Wait upon the LORD to reveal His answer to you.

We prayed, we searched the Scriptures, and we asked God for direction. The hardest part was to admit and be ready that, if the LORD says and requires us to get a divorce, we will have to do as God tells us to do. It felt like something is tearing my heart apart...

It's hard to come to a point where your heart longs to go this way but God seems to be leading you unto another way. When faced with tough decisions, what will you do? Will you choose God's ways over man's ways? How far will you go?

I love to read Proverbs 31. By the end of 2019 I will have read it seven times (once in each month that has thirty-one days). Honestly? Often enough I will read its words with mixed feelings. Why? I feel the standard is quite high and it seems impossible for me to achieve.

A few weeks ago, while reading Proverbs 31, I dwelt on verse 15 for a little while:

(emphasis mine).

While I was thinking about the word "food" something came to my mind. Before I'll go on, I'll have to explain that I'm originally from a region in Germany which is famous for its money wise people. All through our lives we hear: Save! Economize! Use sparingly! 

So how does this relate to the food for her household? Whenever I'm trying to share with others how to save money on grocery bills they will usually reply something like: "I save here and there but I can't cut down on my food expenses." It is important to mention, of course, that saving on food goes hand in hand with being (a little bit more) content with what we are eating. That's where the problem usually lies and the discussion will end: barley, beans, chicken soup, pea stew, lentils, wheat, and many other homemade dishes I grew up with are no longer tasty for the modern tongue. 

The Proverb also says that the woman is not afraid of snow (verse 21), that she watches over the ways of her household, and that she doesn't eat the bread of idleness (verse 27). She is such an extraordinary good role model, isn't she? I admire this woman and would love to become like her some day. How about you?

The past three weeks had been quite tough. In the middle of struggling with problems it's hard to be still and know that God is still in control, isn't it?

One thing happened after another and each situation brought new challenges along. I'm worried about things and so I try to plan ahead to avoid any bad consequences. Planning and organizing just comes naturally to me. Something that isn't in my (human) nature, though, is to be still and to wait upon the LORD.

How about you?

Just a short while ago we had been reading through the Book of Isaiah. Then, the other day, I have stumbled across Psalm 27. I looked over the notes again to remind myself of what we had discussed during our Bible study a few weeks ago. Verse 14 says: Wait on the LORD, be of good courage, and He shall strengthen your heart. Wait, I say, on the LORD! (NKJV)

Yes, it isn't always easy to wait on the LORD. We want to take matters into our own hands, don't we? We want to make things happen then and now - the sooner, the better. The problem is that, often enough, we will fail due to our own weakness; we will faint and be weary, and utterly fall.

But those who wait on the LORD
Shall renew their strength;
They shall mount up with wings like eagles,
They shall run and not be weary,
They shall walk and not faint.
(Isaiah 40:31 NKJV)

If you find yourself going through a tough time these days, take a short time out and open up your Bible to Isaiah 40. Start reading from verse 21 and onward, or, better yet, read the whole chapter (it's only 31 verses long) of Isaiah 40. Then, go ahead and read Psalm 27 to comfort and encourage yourself - to know that, no matter what you are facing today, God remains faithful and in control.